Summertime

I haven't played any ultimate since February. It's the longest stretch I've gone since I started playing in winter of 2005, and it's going to keep going until September at least. For the first time in a very long time, I really miss playing the game just for the sake of the game. Up until now, my motivations have been centered around team goals or personal goals. Now that the college season is over, I realize that I'm starting to kind of forget what playing is like. I can't visualize situations or plays as readily as I used to, and it's strange.

I really miss playing for the sake of exercising, too. I realize now that I'm much less productive and happy when I'm not getting regular workouts. I don't sleep as well at night and I generally feel unhealthier. I've gone from crutches to now walking in my walking boot, and next week I think I'm going to start PT again. I can tell already that it will be hard to not push myself to be more active than my doctor wants me to be. I find that once I break a self imposed barrier in rehab, like walking instead of crutching, there's no going back. I'm worried about what playing will be like and what I'll be able to do after being a couch potato for 5 months.

During other times in my life, if things were going badly or if I was unemployed and bumming around, I could always turn to ultimate or working out as something constant I could rely on while other things in my life changed. Right now, though, I'm just a bum.

I've been watching a huge amount of sports on TV and ultimate videos online. When I'm watching the world cup, or the NBA finals, I'm constantly thinking about how what I'm seeing applies to ultimate. I think watching Smaug for the better part of a season from the sidelines might be a good thing for me in the end, because I feel like I got a more objective, slightly removed perspective on the game. In the end though, I think about ultimate entirely too much and I miss it a lot.